Spring has Sprung

It's been a while...that's how these blogs start when you forget about them for months right?

Well it has been, a while, and I've forgotten to write because I make excuses, and because I know this blog is about to become a novel of rambling.

Since my last post which was a review for a friend I've started working again. It's not a dream job, but I'm aware of how lucky I am to have a job considering the economy. I appreciate that the work is a combination of repetitive and tumultuous. That allows me to day dream, but keep busy, which I like. I haven't been there long, just since February, but for the most part there are moments of laughter and that is something special.

I've been waiting for Spring/Summer since I got back from Germany at the end of last summer. I had an amazing time with my friend Daniel seeing Europe from his perspective, but if I ever go back I want to do more. I want to take my time, not rush through typical travelers sites. I want to climb a mountain again, but sit there, just stair out into the horizon and breath. I want to sit and draw or sing in the streets when it's raining twirling my umbrella. Well, who am I kidding, when I walk my dog around the block and am listening to Frank Sinatra on my phone I twirl around the STOP sign while he sniffs some grass and I pretend I shuffle my feet like I"m in a musical.

The weathers starting to bloom, it's raining constantly sure, but the green is coming back, the earth is coming back to life and that lifts my spirits. I've already gone to a car show and I plan on going to more and festivals as soon as they start popping up around the island. I'm looking forward to going out east to the Hamptons, spending long night in Sag Harbor, walking on the beach and picking up sea shells with holes in them for a necklace I'll never make, but tell myself I will.

I'll be that pale ghost of a woman on the beach burring myself in the sand to cool down or making a sand castle, but most likely a figure of something...last time I made a turtle, but sometimes kicked it...

The pool isn't opened yet, but I can't wait for that day. It's just nice enough to wash the cars, go to the dog park, and get kicked off the beach at night when I go after work by some annoying security guard just because I look like a bumb with a blanket and laying in the sand does not mean I'm an actual bumb thank you!

Next week is my cousin Stephanie's wedding. One of the most beautiful people, inside and out. Granted we don't know each other very well, we're family, we love each other, and share a lot of childhood memories of dancing in newspaper hula skirts to the Beach Boys...yes, there's video and pictures of that. The wedding is in Virginia on April 30th, and I actually be seeing my sister for the first time in months as well. It's also my cousin Debbie's baby shower that weekend, she's going to be HUGE! She's normally MAYBE 100lbs, and by next week she'll be about 8 months pregnant so she'll be a planet, but a beautiful planet I'm sure.

I of course have not bought anything to wear to the wedding and have allowed myself to wait till the last possible second in that I plan on going to look for something the day before, but will probably end up going in a skirt or dress pants which will make my mother furious, but I'm just not a shopper, it's not me. I'm not your "typical" woman. I don't like shopping, I don't own closet full of shoes, handbags, or clothes. I like video games, car shows, going to baseball games with my dad, canoeing on a nice day, going for a hike, but on average...sitting in my yoga pants and sweatshirt watching movies till I pass out and MAYBE building a fire in the backyard and just sitting starring at it with some wine.

I'm supposed to go to this baby shower, and I'll go cause I'm invited and love my cousin, but I know they're going to have games I'm going to fail at. I know a lot about children, I like children, I've been a baby sitter for 14 years, but I won't be as excited about babies and baby things till I have one of my own and that won't be for a long time. I've already bought my cousin every METS baby thing you can buy so I'm set for that, lol. I just think it'll be pretty funny if he grows up not liking the METS.

I'm also excited about this wedding because it means my family will be together and I miss them more than I miss anything else. I miss how we all used to do so much together and so often and how now we only seem to see each other at weddings. I plan on dancing even though I'm horrible at it, and maybe stealing the mic from someone and singing far too loud with my sister and cousins like we used to-it'll make for a great clip in their wedding video I'm sure. I've spent a lot of my youth being shy or in the least quiet, and I am still to a degree, but I've also realized "no guts no glory" if I hide away sure I can't get hurt or rejected, but I can't feel fulfilled and make great memories alone in my room either.

I don't go out THAT often, but who cares if sometimes I have to go out somewhere alone. If I want to go out, I'll go out, if I sit waiting for someone to go with me I'll end up waiting and waiting and missing out. So much more opens to you when you actually DO what you want and of course it's wonderful to be with people or at least someone special, but I'm a firm believer in fate-that we have the ability with our free will to create our path, but that there's an underlying one there for us, we make a choice and we go down a path, and there are more roads, never ending, we make the choice, and then the rest of it flows together as it's meant to.

I'm excited for this new path, this new Spring/Summer, because I'm getting money back in the bank, I have a family reunion underway, a friend expecting, and seemingly limitless possibilities. I don't know what will happen or what can happen yet, and that's scary and exciting and the best part is enjoying it day to day, savoring what I have now, knowing anything can happen tomorrow or later today that could be a new memory I'll treasure.